Bill & Hilary In New Vagina Scandal

Some cucumbers yesterday.

Enigmatic Body Performance Artist and 5 rhythm tantrik yoga expert, Gertie Yakittov was briefly detained at the local Police station yesterday. Officers patiently explained to her that the fruit & veg section of Petrakis supermarket was probably not the best place to preview her up and coming event 'The One-woman Flat Mother Earth Vagina Monologue and Demonstration'

The English tourists, Bill & Hilary Bonkers from Barking, who were also involved in the incident were released without charge. They commented today; "Bill was just saying how wonderful the melons looked when she (Yakittov) started taking an interest in his plums (which we were going to take to the beach). "

Bill continued " Before you could say 'Save The Yangtze Dolphins!' she was up on the counter giving us a sneak preview. I mean... they were just taking in a delivery of cucumbers...there could have been a very nasty accident."

Local police said this morning in a press release that they were aware of Yakittov's forthcoming Vagina Event and specially trained officers would be "looking into it". Also everything taken down in Petrakis supermarket yesterday could be used in evidence.

Following the local police press comments, a high level police spokesman from Hania confirmed that "our policy that the old ones are the best remains unchanged"