Dirty Protest!

Paleochora was shaken to its foundations yesterday by an unprecedented event. For the first time in living memory Ms Teake, Ms Demena and ‘Dr’ Insa Ne, shown above, joined together in a common cause without anyone making reference to the infamous “Flying Goat Buttock” affair of 1998.

The reason for the fearsome combinations was a “dirty protest” over the lack of sun umbrellas on the nude bathing end of Paleochora’s famous Sandy Beach.

Speaking for the protesters as they made their naked journey along the promenade from the Pebble Beach to the jetty, through the village and along the sandy beach, Mentor Lee Hill, Seventh Level Guru and part time olive picker, told the startled crowd of on lookers - Sid and Doris Bonkers from Oldham - or was it Neasden, that the protest was intended to illustrate the dangers to the public if the Mayor didn’t immediately install at least 25 large sunshades at the Grameno end of the beach.

“Without these umbrellas these fine ladies will be unable to continue to offer their ever popular ‘Nude over 80’s full frontal tantric sex and yoga classes’ every other afternoon starting at 3pm, with the result that many of the over 80 year old tourists visiting Paleochora will be forever deprived of their one bit of excitement in their otherwise dull and miserable lives,” he said before going on to offer discounted rates for the classes to those approaching 60.

Opinion in the village is divided but most people, on being told that the Mayor’s refusal to put up the umbrellas was likely to cause the cancellation of the nude over 80’s full frontal tantric sex and yoga classes, applauded his action, or inaction.

Meantime, ‘Dr’ Insa Ne has confirmed that the 19th Annual “I’m going to take my sarong off and run naked around an olive tree shouting woo woo because my inner child gave me permission to do so Festival” has indeed been cancelled blaming the lack of petrol caused by the tanker strike - thus enabling her to claim a huge amount of money back on her insurance.