Ms Demena's men (u)

Ms Demena preparing for summer with her new, and as yet unknown, assistant.

Ms Demena yesterday confirmed that her ever popular one person tent on the beach at Azogyres, would this summer be offering her usual range of acupressure, affirmational/attitudinal healing, aromatherapy, chakra balancing, colour therapy, crystal energy balancing, ear candling, influence of past lives/future lives and karmic proclivities on present wellness status, magnet therapy(this modality utilizes natural electrical energy to re-align the body’s electrical system to improve wellness. Any condition can be relieved with magnet use. Often magnets are used to manage allergies, headaches, arthritis, cancer, fibromyalgis, headaches,menstrual disorders, prostate disorders,) mandala, nutritional counseling for energy balancing from chakric or five phase perspectives, personal training, pranic healing, raw foods, reflexology, relaxation, stress reduction, supplements, visualization; but only between 7am and 9am on alternate days of the week.*

“Once the open air kinematagraphick projection facility in the village opens up, that’s me done for the day,” she said. “You don’t expect me to miss my evening experience with Zorbas the Greek just to earn a bob or two do you? Anyway that poor lad needs me to massage his aura and keep his pranic energies flowing through all seven of his five chakras and I can tell you that’s a job and a half on its own!”

*Mal Akker would like to point out that Ms Demena's own patented "magnetic healing" system, consisting as it does of wiring her customers up to a 3 phase 415 volt generator, throwing a bucket of warter on them and switching on the generator, has not yet been approved by the Greek Medical Authorities. However, the technique commonly use by the American Govenment on certain persons held in Guantanamo Bay.